Food Drop Please

Time is speeding up a little bit now. Most of the family know so maybe that helps.

Most of work don't know but I was busted big time by L. Apparently just because I had biscuits on my desk. (And then compounded by drinking orange and lemonade at the pub). We've agreed I'm the world's worst liar. I went all silly when asked why I wasn't drinking. The next day, a colleague, seemingly out of nowhere, started talking about how she was going to have to think about having children. L tried to deflect the conversation by saying 'oh get a dog'. So colleague asks L, 'are you going to get a dog?' L says 'no'. Then colleague turns to me and says 'are you going to have children?' Cue silly grin and the old 'maybe one day' response.

I still feel sick and particularly on Thursdays. (Based on two Thursdays so far.) I've disliked Thursdays since childhood - fish for tea, music lessons at school and even now it's the busiest day at work. But I've only thrown up once so that's quite good.

I'm trying to eat lots of good food and still get exercise but I get out of breath so easily. Now even D can walk faster than me. And I am soooo tired all the time. Tired and lazy. I came home early today to tidy and so far have only managed to eat a bag of fizzy gummy worms, some onion ring crisps and a can of red kola while lying on the couch watching Corrie. And I'll eat more - I'll eat a whole larder of food, you see if I don't.

But really I am being good most days. The only thing I'm rubbish at is drinking water. Water sucks.

What you wish for

Weeks (kind of) of nothing happening. Then today:

- morning sickness (that will be the last plum I eat in a while)
- confirmation from GP
- booking in appt - 27 September
- scan - 12 October
- insanely tired

Still Waiting

So, some hapless van driver forgot to bring test results to the GP surgery today so, as far as the medical profession is concerned, I remain loopy phantom pregnancy lady. I'm so compliant - I should have insisted they book me in for my first appt anyway and that they could cancel it if I am revealed to be LPPL. But, no, Im waiting for tomorrow. And waiting.

Week 8 (or at least we'll say it is for now). The Phantom

Finally more time passed and I went to the Doctors on Friday 3 September. Do not misunderstand me - I was under no illusions that this would be a visit of any real import. However, I did not expect to come away wondering if I was pregnant at all. Almost 50% of the appt was the doctor explaining how she needed proof that I was pregnant before going any further and explaining what to do if the lab report came back negative. Everyone else I've ever heard speak about it has said the doctor took their word for it. Granted, most people are baffled by this, but so repeated is the story, I was fully expecting to be believed. Silly me. So until tomorrow afternoon, I'm loopy phantom pregnancy lady as far as the medical profession is concerned. So I decided to act a bit loopy and call up today for my result, just in case. But no such luck. The receptionist was very nice about it, but it just wasn't in yet. Maybe they are checking it twice.

And in fact, there's no denying it, I am loopy because I've now done 4 tests. The last one was soo pink and so immediate, I can't possibly be in doubt. And yet I am - until tomorrow.

Week 5 (or is it 6, or even 7?) - the perception of time when pregnant might be different than the time experienced not pregnant

Catchy title, huh? It's been 9 days since we found out. I've been through a few changes already. I was up 4 nights in a row needing the loo urgently. I had to fight my way around the bed and woke D up each time. So we've swapped sides of the bed. After one more interrupted sleep (but just me this time), my body obviously adjusted and I can sleep through the night again. I still have to go more often than I'd like during the day. I also had what felt like weeks of cramps but of course was only a few days. And that's the worst thing. Time is going by sooo slowly. I just want to be a little bit more pregnant. I have some apps on my phone that tell me the baby's development and my supposed symptoms. I feel like I've been reading the same ones for years and years.


But the cramps seem to have stopped now. And I don't feel sick. So then I worry that something is wrong. In fact, perhaps I'm not really pregnant. It is a phantom pregnancy, surely. I dreamed it up. So I bought more tests yesterday. 4 more - but they were cheapy ones from one of those cheap chemists. And, yup, two pink lines it is.

Having said that about no symptoms, I was priding myself on not feeling tired last week but am barely able to keep my eyes open at the moment.

And here's the other thing. Exactly how pregnant am I? Supposedly it's from the first day of your lmp (get with the lingo guys). So for the first two weeks of your 'pregnancy', you are not actually pregnant. So going by that info, I'm 6 weeks and 2 days, or in week 7. And in real terms, the embryo (for that is all it is at the moment) has only existed for 4 weeks. However, I'm a late starter and am convinced my embryo has only been in existence for 3 weeks. But in medical terms, this does not stop me being 6 weeks and 2 days pregnant. But all this makes it difficult to know which of the progressing photos of blobs on my apps my embryo actually looks like. So I'm taking a guess and am masquerading as a 5 weeker. Not that it matters one iota I don't suppose, and especially because time has ceased to move on.

And on a final point, it is sooo difficult to eat more than 5 fruit and veg a day as well as the right amount of protein and that omega stuff. And that's coming from a regular fruit muncher. It's costing a fortune already.